Monday, October 12, 2009

A Letter to Scarlett Johansson


Ahh, Mrs. J. How little we knew you. You actually do have a wonderful singing voice when you try. I have listened to Break Up about half-a-dozen times since I found it at a nearby Starbucks and I think that you could challenge a few other singers out there (American Idol contestants have nothing on you).

Yes, I bought it. No downloading for free if I can help it. I figured that I was curious enough to get the whole package and that I owed you one, since I had not seen one of your films since Lost in Translation (man, I miss Tokyo!)

Now, this Pete Yorn fellow: Are you sure this is how you want to go? Most of the stuff he wrote for you is pretty middle-of-the-road fare, excepting some of the blips and noises on Relator (my least favorite song on the album and the one released with a video, but I digress). This is not say that he cannot write. I Don't Know What to Do, Blackie's Dead and even Clean work for me (good for your vocal range). But you need another challenge. Not that covering Tom Waits wasn't a challenge (we all know that it was), but maybe other collaborations could work. Any interest in the Flaming Lips? Yo La Tengo? The London Symphony Orchestra? They could all do with your touch...

Nice cover of I Am The Cosmos, by the way. Who picked that Chris Bell classic? Please say that it was you. I doubt that Mr Yorn would have chosen it, as it is the most moving song on the CD. Maybe I should add Alex Chilton to the list and see if he is free.

All right, you did it. I did not waste my money out of curiosity over something with your face on it. I am giving you a pass on this one. I may even check out another of your films one day!
KD

P.S. Use real drums next time! All those electronic strings and programming effects can only take you so far.

P.P.S. You really saved your hubby's bacon on SNL! Porcelain fountains, anyone?

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